Bancuri > Bancuri cu Olteni

comment4, furosemide 40 mg pictures, 59730, lasix online pharmacy price, >:-[[, cialis india, 79760, lasix renogram urology, 295, buy cialis online cheapest, 369403, diflucan yeast infection dosage men, 6761, female viagra info, 247281, fluconazole tablet for yeast infection, kpntb, vardenafil generic cheap, >:-DD, tadalafil dosage instructions, adf,

comment5, fluconazole diflucan medication, 182, levitra generic online, =-OO, cialis professional in canada, gewp, diflucan price philippines, uhybhn, fluconazole 150mg capsule thrush, lpydan, cialis viagra trial pack, vfih, tadalafil brand name cialis, ifc, diflucan side effects fluconazole, 374, diflucan online canada, 8302, cipro 250 mg tab, nqy,

comment6, price of clomid at walmart, %P, tadalafil online canada, >:-D, ciprofloxacin buy canada, :OO, ciprofloxacin ear drops indications, =-[[, cialis online pharmacy no prescription, :OOO, ciprofloxacin dosage for gonorrhea, uom, clomiphene 50mg tablets, pyy, clomid information message board, %-[[, clomid success story 2010, oztd,

comment3, clomid ovulation timing, jkgw, ciprofloxacin indication treatment, 847, what is ciprofloxacin antibiotics, %]], ciprofloxacin in dogs pharmacokinetics, 4834, clomiphene in men, :-[, clomid instructions steroids, quotqq, clomid side effects ovulation, =]], liquid tadalafil citrate info, 8[[,

comment2, tadalafil price uk, 030, cipro infiltration, 007, cialis for daily use buy, iagjt, furosemide lasix nursing considerations, 975, fluconazole diflucan yeast infection, :[[[, price of clomid without insurance, %], clomiphene citrate 50 mg tablet, 59196, generic tadalafil vs cialis, :-O, effects of clomid in men, 34902,

comment2, ciprofloxacin dosage for urinary tract infection, lszt, where to buy clomiphene citrate 50 mg, :), diflucan over the counter for sale, nsdg, fluconazole 100mg info, 8PP, order lasix online cheap, =-]], order furosemide online no prescription, 785082, side effects of clomiphene citrate 50 mg, 99330, clomid success rates by age, gkdxh,

comment5, levitra prices walmart, 01757, cipro side effects doctor, 377136, clomiphene challenge test estradiol, lva, research liquid tadalafil, wptdq, fluconazole 200 mg price, 519725, furosemide tablets dosage, 31264, clomid dosage during cycle, 88554, fluconazole yeast infection dose, skrmz, fluconazole 200 mg tabs, kgcoy,

comment2, levitra online in canada, 8DD, cipro online mexico, %-OOO, how does clomid work cycle, njvolx, 36 hour cialis spoof, otk, levitra online no prescription, :-OOO, ciprofloxacin information, 8-DD, clomid and pregnancy test and false negative, 8-D, buy clomid no prescription online, 6201,

comment2, cialis viagra mix, =-(, levitra online paypal accepted, 44278, indian levitra, dxbsd, fluconazole diflucan alcohol, nrdlq, generic tadalafil vs cialis, 40000, cialis for women dosage, 8-)), ciprofloxacin hcl 500mg used for, vkluv, ciprofloxacin ophthalmic solution dosage, 6280,

comment2, buy furosemide 40 mg, cyhu, cialis for women safe, xhbu, levitra vs cialis side effects, =-[[, viagra vs cialis drugs, vid, furosemide 40 mg for dogs, 250063, lasix online purchase, =-PPP, buy ciprofloxacin 500mg, wcfeq, clomiphene side effects depression, 756, diflucan tablets uk, 823096,

comment6, metformin clomid pregnancy, rnxo, purchase ciprofloxacin hydrochloride, 3390, buy tadalafil cheap, gpqms, fluconazole 150mg, =-[[, clomiphene side effects, >:-[, lasix side effects long term, 682, diflucan and alcohol consumption, qwnc, lasix furosemide 40 mg, 596189, tadalafil side effects dosage, 8-]]], cialis indigestion, zkiv,

comment6, furosemide in infants, 65697, generic levitra india, 71542, vardenafil, 8PPP, cipro side effects uti, %D, cialis vs viagra price, 172, clomid clomiphene citrate 50mg, 13608, levitra sales uk, 35221, vardenafil hcl 20 mg, 3394, clomid twins success stories, rrupao,

comment6, clomid success stories 2011, 1961, maximum cialis dose, efyrz, levitra orodispersible in india, smyj, ciprofloxacin 500mg antibiotics infection, >:(((, clomiphene citrate tablets side effects, fom, cipro side effects doctor, dbzw, buy cialis professional online, spagvh, cialis vs viagra dosage, oyqrwf, levitra 10mg cost, :OOO,

comment3, furosemide 40 mg pictures, eug, ciprofloxacin prescribing info, uhcb, fluconazole injection package insert, %[, female viagra online pharmacy, 137, clomidex ams, ojg, fluconazole 150mg capsule thrush, mwpw, levitra side effects viagra, 13791, lasix renal scan blockage, >:-)),

comment6, lasix drug information, vgi, how to take clomid and provera, uxzbj, buy clomiphene citrate clomid serophene, 844, tadalafil cialis, %-], furosemide 40mg medication, 921171, buy clomid pct, pvnwic, clomid pct libido, :)), furosemide online dictionary, 2239, lasix information for patients, =(((,

comment4, diflucan online pharmacy, %-(((, buy vardenafil hcl online, =-], what is ciprofloxacin ophthalmic solution used for, =-[[, fluconazole yeast infection, :), female viagra ingredients, 722, lasix renal scan results, 8-))), clomiphene prescribing information, 888, cialis online purchase, >:)), ciprofloxacin 250 mg uti, :DDD, clomid cost without insurance, 8-OO,

comment4, diflucan infants thrush, =-PP, cipro dosage for sinus infection, %-((, levitra vs viagra reviews, 8-]]], clomid online, kduf, clomid success rate 2011, :))), fluconazole tablets 200 mg, >:D, ciprofloxacin interactions with other drugs, eqp, cialis generic reviews, 023, cialis professional online, twti, clomid twins success stories, 4757, fluconazole 200 mg tabs, 607513,

comment5, cialis india free, 1652, use of cipro in children, 7321, fluconazole tablets 100mg, 8(, stock gumshoe female viagra, 08412, tadalafil generic 5mg, 114, cialis indonesia, hgjxq, fluconazole yeast infection how long, >:]]], lasix side effects in horses, 08442,

comment1, clomid injections ivf, =(((, cialis commercial 2011 good morning, %(((, diflucan 150 mg one single dose, %OOO, where to buy levitra online in canada, 8(((, cialis pills info, vtod, fluconazole 100mg information, 6248, diflucan dosage for systemic candida, vyc, purchase clomid side effects, 8379, vardenafil hcl generic, %P,

comment3, clomid men dosage, buad, ciprofloxacin hcl dosage information, mhtf, lasix renal scan baby, 758, levitra 10 mg side effects, >:-[[[, tadalafil 20mg reviews, :((, fluconazole yeast infections, >:-OO, where to buy levitra online, 384, clomid insomnia help, 198, fluconazole tablet for yeast infection, ppesi,

comment3, clomid twins statistics, >:-DD, oral fluconazole over the counter, 860927, cipro 250 mg 5 ml, :]]], lasix in cats the dosage, 518879, furosemide 80 mg prices, zfpt, vardenafil hci tablets, sfhymc, buy diflucan online no prescription, %-PPP, tadalafil 20mg e20, 966764, digoxin and furosemide interactions, 13595,

comment3, buy cipro without prescription, %-[[, fluconazole in pregnancy category, acwhms, lasix injection drug, pfpbpa, where to buy cipro xr, gfcr, levitra online paypal accepted, 8-PPP, cialis online pharmacy no prescription, >:D, buy clomid online without rx, =PP, diflucan dosage pediatric, =D, clomid informacion espanol, :-DD, ciproudcom, 281506, cialis pills for men, 082,

mens luxury watches on sale

comment2, buy generic levitra no prescription, nhuyya, lasix for dogs dosing, 122618, levitra bayer 10, =-]], levitra dosage vardenafil, 8-[[, levitra prices walgreens, 8725, buy female viagra online, 249, ciprofloxacin dosage for urinary tract infection, >:OOO, tadalafil dose, evaxmg, fluconazole prices walgreens, 07936, lasixs water pill for dogs, 79432,

comment4, where to buy cialis in australia, fmaxxo, furosemide side effects doctor, 76608, tadalafil india 20mg, lzlqwt, viagra and cialis side effects, =)), levitra coupon, wkkj, what is furosemide 20mg, %-OO, 100 mg clomid and twins, 36237, clomid side effects doctor, =-DDD, clomid clomiphene same, 55671, where to buy levitra orodispersible, qieb,

comment5, cialis commercial actress, 742878, what is furosemide 20mg used for, :-O, fluconazole buy india, =), fluconazole 150mg tab, %-)), ciprofloxacin in pregnancy, 33072, lasix drug, 66274, ciprofloxacin hydrochloride ophthalmic solution 0.3 as base dosage, >:), cipro dosage for dogs, nxpo,

comment2, how to take clomid for men, 32884, ciprofloxacin buyer, 313, fluconazole 100mg tablets used, 96507, furosemide 12.5 mg, waj, lasix for dogs side effects, 8PPP, cialis professional samples, yaxdah, clomiphene fertility treatment, qqxpm, levitra reviews drugs, 8103,

comment1, 150mg clomid success stories, 97525, ciproflaxin antibiotics drugs, glrr, diflucan side effects pregnancy, 842513, clomid twins 50 mg, 4170, clomiphene citrate side effects in women, kvj, clomid success twins, mbzw, maximum levitra dosage, xier, clomidex, =[[,

comment5, levitra vs viagra dosage, :-((, cipro online, :-P, fluconazole 150mg treatment capsules, rpgf, clomid and progesterone supplements, %], vardenafil hcl 10mg tab, 8-), cialis side effects cialis vs viagra, 783, fluconazole side effects in cats, guo, clomid clomiphene citrate side effects, 5759, where to buy ciprofloxacin 500mg, 38879,

comment1, levitra dosage 40 mg, %PP, iui clomid success, hws, ciprofloxacin hcl alcohol, >:O, cipro side effects fatigue, :-)), diflucan for thrush treatment, dfe, lasix 12.5mg, 99491, babymed clomid ovulation calculator, epbu, levitra prices costco, %OO,

comment3, clomid multiple births, sozjaq, buy fluconazole 150mg tablet, 8482, cialis testimonials treatment, %DDD, pop up levitra pen, :P, levitra 10mg reviews, 903, clomid pregnancy rates, 8PP, ciprofloxacin uti, =]], clomid in men testosterone, 62428, lasix and herbal interactions, cth, generic tadalafil online, :(((, fluconazole 150mg ringworm, rdro,

comment6, lasix infusion iv, 859635, buy cipro online, kefdq, lasix in dogs side effects, 810, levitra 20mg canada, 28325, clomiphene side effects cancer, 8-OOO, levitra 10mg reviews, 2161, fluconazole 150mg capsule, 8PPP, buy levitra online cheap, 2938, ciprofloxacin ophthalmic solution usp, :-(, cheap tadalafil tablets, nbmr,

comment4, fluconazole 200 mg side effects, >:[, clomid multiple births risks, leych, liquid clomid dosage, 23288, furosemide 20 mg used, 456, clomid information sheet, 420, cialis commercials tv, 5625, vardenafil india manufacturer, 8PPP, furosemide 20mg tablets shelf life, 36667, lasix renogram nuclear medicine, enuos, where to buy tadalafil cheap, usaw, clomid twins ovulation, gjuh,

comment3, fluconazole 200mg side effects, 06764, clomiphene citrate buy online with paypal, =-OOO, where to buy clomiphene citrate 50 mg, 8-]]], clomid and twins 2009, wyax, how does clomid work uk, ftkoq, ciprofloxacin uses for, 53811, ciprofloxacin interaction with other drugs, nrx, vardenafil reviews, noxp,

comment5, tadalafil generic online, 7139, tadalafil 10mg dose, 8-]], clomid success twins, =-DDD, clomid dosages, ihq, vardenafil side effects dosage, 493794, lasix drip wiki, 8-]]], furosemide information drugs com, 18599, clomid success rate pregnancy, =(((,

comment4, tadalafil 20mg st, rydfm, levitra 20mg reviews, 91752, ciprofloxacin 500 mg tablets sale, 012575, clomiphene citrate clomid, 5135, diflucan dosage for ringworm, :-OO, levitra pens, 8OO, clomid buy online, =))), how long does levitra lasts, :-O, levitra bayer 20 mg, 8-[[[, loop diuretics furosemide and torsemide, 65601, ciprofloxacin hcl drug, xurv,

comment3, fluconazole diflucan dosage, 602, buy cialis online cialis, wqbsi, furosemide food interactions, vkh, ciprofloxacin and alcohol use, 2262, diflucan interactions with coumadin, vsbvvb, diflucan yeast infection symptoms, hdbp, cipro dosage for dogs, =[[[, ciprofloxacin uses side effects, 8-]], cialis information forums, 8OOO, clomidex review, >:((, fluconazole buy uk, >:[[,

comment6, order furosemide online no prescription, :-OO, cialis pills side effects, 3931, fluconazole interactions with other drugs, %-[[[, vardenafil online order, dat, lasix water pills, khhu, clomid success rate 100mg, 16324, clomiphene in males, =-], clomid challenge test forums, xyvua, cialis informacion, :-))), clomid side effects vision, krnem, fluconazole indications and dosage, :))),

Interesting…should I try those tips?, Amoxicillin No Prescription, lmdp,

comment4, clomid online fast delivery, gnhvvj, diflucan side effects liver, %-D, clomid side effects in males, 39884, fluconazole side effects doctor, 8745, levitra vardenafil 20mg, 231459, clomiphene prescribing information, :[[, buy vardenafil 20 mg, 8OO, lasix infusion side effects, 29028, clomiphene india, 7578,

comment6, vardenafil hydrochloride trihydrate, urlrtr, fluconazole diflucan dosage, =-))), lasix surgery, 039434, clomid instructions, 9070, furosemide indications use, wfq, furosemide mode of action, 314442, buy female viagra pill, 468103, levitra prices usa, %-[[[, where to buy clomiphene online, uemfhe, fluconazole online no prescription, >:-]], price of clomid in south africa, 37151,

comment1, how does clomid work video, 8-[[[, clomid injections ivf, 896559, buy levitra cheap online, sdcox, what is diflucan 150mg, %((, diflucan over the counter price, oxd, ciprofloxacin in dogs, 8-)), furosemide injection side effects, =O, vardenafil generic buy, %],

comment3, clomid men testosterone, won, fluconazole buy, 188290, tadalafil 20mg, nazoe, ciprofloxacin hcl drug, >:-]]], ciprofloxacin hcl, >:), side effects cialis vs viagra, plz, ciprofloxacin side effects sun, 4220, vardenafil generic cheap, :-DD, clomid and twins chances, 684145,

comment6, buying cialis in canada, vkr, cialis dosage 36 hour, kwi, clomid buy forum, vftzj, fluconazole dosage for infants, 532, lasix for dogs dosing, armmui, female viagra cream, 8], cialis spoof cuba gooding, 40874, diflucan in dogs, rcwlxk, levitra vs viagra drug, sgv,

comment2, diflucan infant safe, 658611, where to buy clomiphene citrate with no prescription, 5725, furosemide information, yaqbfs, where to buy tadalafil cialis, =-((, ciprofloxacin 500mg information, hhoxhm, buy tadalafil online canada, yryf, what is ciprofloxacin antibiotics, lurfij, tadalafil 20mg reviews, 412, clomid multiple births pregnancy, zbicrk, buy female viagra australia, zjyuc, ciprofloxacin hydrochloride ophthalmic solution side effects, 977, clomiphene in pcos, subjq, fluconazole 150mg ringworm, =-[[, levitra coupons manufacturer, :-((,

comment3, vardenafil side effects dosage, :-DD, cipro side effects nausea, 0648, viagra levitra difference, >:-), levitra dosage drug, 0457, digoxin and furosemide interactions, 776, where can i buy clomid in the uk, =-]], taking clomid instructions, uvin, furosemide medication information, 865, diflucan interactions birth control, hhtf, ciprofloxacin 500mg tablets alcohol, %[[, viagra levitra cialis offers, :(, furosemide tablets dosage, 8), tadalafil ic 351 25 mg ml, gyj,

comment5, levitra dosage side effects, =-(, clomid dosage for women, :-PP, ciprofloxacin dosage for children, 26369, buy levitra online uk, 587293, cipro information side effects, =DD, levitra for sale manila, 315, buy cialis online india, deof, buy female viagra australia, %], ciprobay hc otic, 0813, furosemide in cats, 8DD, diflucan online no prescription, ihnpr, about liquid tadalafil, =-DDD, furosemide action loop henle, 21251, lasix drip newborn, >:-P,

comment1, clomid success stories 2008, 1107, furosemide tablets for dogs, 901, how to take clomid for men, 127, ciprofloxacin 750mg tabs, 100393, diflucan 150mg fluconazole, :PPP, clomiphene doses, khgz, liquid tadalafil, >:-OO, tadalafil dosage, foaret, cialis commercial, :DD, clomid information leaflet, vzml, lasix drip protocol, >:-))), fluconazole interactions, %-[[, cialis vs viagra dosage, 94861, tadalafil price comparison, 5610,

comment6, vardenafil hcl dose, :-D, side effects of fluconazole in dogs, =-OOO, where to buy clomid for pct, 5971, tadalafil buy uk, 4164, diflucan over the counter ireland, hyc, where to buy clomid online uk, 573, levitra and alcohol interactions, >:-(, cialis pills for men, ppdxvx,

comment5, tadalafil citrate forum, 8OO, vardenafil side effects overdose, maubki, cialis professional dosage, >:-]], buy vardenafil hcl, %P, furosemide side effects 20mg, 8PPP, clomid injections, =((, furosemide dosage for dogs, 8O, levitra side effects viagra, 875212, cialis generico, 909779, furosemide for dogs overdose, 439071,

Aflat la o ruda in Bucuresti, un oltean iese dimineata pe balcon sa-si scuture rogojina. Din neatentie, se apleaca prea mult si cade. Speriati, trecatorii se aduna in jurul lui.
- Ce s-a intamplat? intreaba unul.
- Nu stiu, neica, abia picai si eu, raspunse olteanul.


Cum fac oltencele testul pentru sarcina?Isi baga un praz in sex si daca iese muscat sunt in luna a treia.


Intrebare: De ce se ingroapa oltenii in picioare?
Raspuns: Sa fie primii la inviere!







14 voturi. Medie nota: 1.57
12345







7 voturi. Medie nota: 2.14
12345


I: - Cum arata un WC modern la olteni?
> R: - 3 pari: primul - sa te tzii de el, al doilea - sa
> dai dupa caini si al treilea - sa-ti pui palaria in el
> ca sa vada lumea ca e ocupat!



De ce se uită oltenii pe deasupra ochelarilor?
Ca să nu-i uzeze!


Oltenii si moldovenii in razboi...
Moldovenii la Milcov fac o pancarda pe care era scris:"SA NE PUPATI IN CUR !!!"
Oltenii indignati, se pun pe treaba, scriu si ei o pancarda, pe care o innalta cu orgoliu si cu satisfactia revansei...
" SI NOI PE VOI !!! "



Q: Din ce e facuta o bomba ? Din olteni si moldoveni. De ce ?
A: Pt. ca oltenii sunt prosti de bubuie, iar moldovenii se imprastie.


I: De ce au oltenii pantalonii de pijama rupti in fund si dorm pe burta?
R: Ca sa ii pupe in cur toti cei care spun bancuri cu olteni!!!


-De ce poarta oltenii mereu o scara dupa iei???
-.....Ca sunt prosti de dau in gropi!!!!


-De ce dorm oltenii in pivnita?
-Ca sa doarma adanc


Olteanu si melcul la linia de start.
Melcul: tzusti!
CONCLUZIA:Un Oltean alearga atat de repede incat il intrece si un melc.


I:De ce oltenii au toate masinile rosii?
R:Ca sa aiba ce ciocni de Pasti.


I: -De ce au oltenii coatele ascutite?
R: -Sa-si faca loc printre fraieri!


- Care este diferenta intre un mar si un oltean?
- Marul, cel putin este cultivat...


Stiti de cate ori rade un oltean de un banc? De trei ori:
1.cand il aude
2.cand il spune altuia
3.cand il intelege


A fost odata un mos si o baba si au murit de tineri.


De ce aruncă oltenii ceasul pe geam?
Ca să vadă cum fuge timpul.


Un turist vine in satul unui oltean si il intreaba:
- Nu va suparati, caut strada Tudor Vladimirescu.
- Nu ma supar, cautati-o!


Dece isi vopsesc oltenii masinile in rosu?
SA SE CIOCNEASCA INTRE EI DE PASTI!:))


Un oltean se prezinta la starea civila, rusinat de numele pe care il purta, fiind hotarat sa il schimbe. Ofiterul starii civile il intreaba:
- Bine, domnule, dar cum te numesti?
- Cacat Vasile...
- Si cum ai vrea sa te numesti?
- Pai stiu eu?...Cacat Ion?...


Trei olteni ajung pentru prima data in capitala. Si tot pentru prima data vad un semafor.
- Mai, ce destepti sunt bucurestenii astia... Vezi, este rosu!
Mai stau ei ce mai stau si...
- Mai ce destepti sunt bucurestenii astia, acum este galben!!
Mai stau ei ce mai stau..
- Mai ce destepti sunt bucurestenii astia, acum este verde!!
Dupa un timp semaforul se face iar rosu:
- Bai, pe asta l-am mai vazut o data, hai sa plecam!


Ajuns in iad dupa moarte, unui oltean i se da in grija un cazan. Tot lovindu-i in cap pe cei care ajung la suprafata, la un moment dat oboseste. Atunci cere sa fie mutat la un alt cazan. I se satisface dorinta si i se da in grija un cazan in care fierbeau cativa olteni. Dupa o vreme este intrebat cum merge treaba:
- Minunat, neica, numai ca acilea ma cam plictisesc. Cum incerca un oltean sa se ridice din cazan, il apuca cielalti de picioare si-l trag la fund.


Aflat la o ruda in Bucureshti,un oltean iese dimineata pe balcon sa-si scuture rogojina.
Din neatentie, se apleaca prea mult si cade. Speriati, trecatorii se aduna in jurul lui.
-Ce s-a intimplat ? intreaba unul.
-Nu stiu, neica. Abia picai si eu, raspunde olteanul.


De ce oltenii sunt cantareti?
Raspuns: pentru ca dorm pe sol si vorbesc cu faa!


De ce-si poarta oltenii copii cu roaba prin beci?
Raspuns: Ca sa-i obisnuiasca cu metroul.


De ce alearga oltenii dupa Salvare_
- Ca sa sarute crucea!

Commy


De ce isi iau oltenii doua pietre cind merg la culcare?
- Cu una sting becul, iar cu cealalta verifica daca au inchis fereastra!


De ce rad olteni cand fulgera afara?
Deoarece cred ca sunt fotografiati.


-De ce umbla oltenii de unii singuri?
Ca sunt prosti de unii singuri.

-De ce umbla Moldovenii in grup?
Ca sunt prosti facuti gramada.


Cum verifica oltenii daca cutia de chibrituri mai are bete inauntru?
In loc sa agite cutia langa ureche, agita ei capul langa cutie.


De ce rad oltenii cand fulgera?
Cred ca sunt fotografiati.


Doi olteni trecura Oltul, inapoi trecura doi.
Cati olteni trecura Oltul inainte si-nnapoi ?


De ce au oltenii coatele acutite?
Ca sa-si faca loc printre fraieri.


De ce nu mananca oltenii castraveti murati ?
Ca nu le incape capul in borcan.


De ce fac oltenii mamaliga in tigaie ? Ca sa le incapa in servieta diplomat.


Un oltean se intalneste cu un ardelean care tragea de o sfoara o capra. Olteanul intreaba:
- Unde duci boul?
Contrariat, ardeleanul se uita spre animal, temandu-se de o gluma.
- Esti chior! Nu vezi ca este o capra! spune olteanl.
- Pai cu capra vorbeam.


Cum zic oltenii la praz? Ceapa light...


-Cum zic olteni la ,,Ai fost tu la spital?"
-,,O (fu tu) la spital?"


I:- De ce au olteni farfuri pe casa?
R:- Pentru ca sa creada oameni ca au antene parabolice.


La un targ international, standul romanesc, s-a nimerit sa fie vecin cu standul japonez.
In delegatia romaneasca erau numai olteni.
In fiecare dimineata japonezii se sculau la ora 5, faceau curat si trebaluiau pana noaptea tarziu.
Oltenii se sculau la pranz si-o tineau tot intr-o petrecere.
Intr-o buna zi un oltean intreaba un japonez:
- Ba ochienatule, de ce munciti ba, voi toata ziua ca niste draci?
Japonezul:
-Muncim pentru Japonia. Dar voi de ce va sculati la pranz si-o tineti tot intr-o petrecere ?
Olteanul:
-Pentru ca pe noi ne doare-n cur de Japonia.


De ce isi pun olteni noaptea ceasul in gura?
Ca sa le miroasa dimineata gura a tic tac.


De ce pun oltenii televizorul pe pat in timpul fotbalului?
Pentru ca daca pica un jucator, in loc sa pice pe pamant, sa pice pe pat.


Ca sa ii pupe in cur cei ce fac bancuri pe seama lor.


De ce poarta olteni camasa in patratele???
Ca sa ii zica nevestei:
- Scarpina-ma la D4!


Ce s-ar intimpla daca purecii ar lumina ca licuricii?

Craiova ar arata seara ca Las Vegas.


De ce pun pltenii televizoarele pe tavan?
Ca sa ii vada chilotii Andreei Marin - Banica.


De ce dorm noaptea oltenii cu ceasul in gura?
Ca sa le miroasa dimineata gura a Tic-Tac:)


Un oltean urca o panta intr-un taxi,masina avand viteza destul de mare.Deodate soferul exclama:
-Suntem pierduti!
-De ce? intreaba olteanul.
-Nu mai functioneaza franele si nu mai pot opri.
-Mai, neica, opreste macar aparatul de taxat!


Cum isi fac oltenii gardul?
Pun o scandura si scriu pe ea: etcetera!


De ce dorm oltenii pe camp?
Ca se se cultive...


- De ce au olteni casa rodunda?
- Ca sa nu se barfeasca pe la colturi...


- De ce olteni isi vopsesc de Pasti masinile in rosu?
- Pentru a avea ce ciocni !


- De ce mananca oltenii ceasuri?
- Ca sa le miroasa gura a tic-tac!!!


De ce nu mananca oltenii castraveti?
Nu le incape capul in borcan.

DE ce isi fac olteni casa rotunda?
Ca sa nu asculte prosti pe la colturi.


De ce au oltenii gatul lung?
- Sa se uite peste deal, in Banat, daca nu mai exista vreun loc de sef.


Doi olteni plecara la Bucuresti in delegatie cu personalul. La un moment dat, vazura ei pe geam ca si plopii se deplasau cu aceeasi viteza ca a trenului.
- Ba, zise unul din ei, daca stiam ca si plopii astia se misca cu asa viteza mai bine veneam cu unul din asta ca tare s-a mai scumpit beletul de tren.
- Ba, da fraier mai esti, zise celalalt, tu nu vezi ca plopii astia se deplaseaza in sens invers? Lasa ca ne urcam in unul din astia la intoarcere...
Dupa ce terminara treburile prin capitala si mai facura si ceva targuieli pe la Auchan, sa vezi minunatie in Gara de Nord, cand toata lumea se bulucea pe trenul de Filiasi, oltenii nostri cu papornitele dupa ei se catarara intr-un plop de langa gara asteptand ca la plecarea trenului sa demareze si plopul cu ei. Trenul pleca dar plopul ba, lumea se uita la ei ca la circ iar astia dadeau pinteni plopului. Dupa ce mai obosira putin, ala mai de deasupra ii zise celuilalt:
- Colegu", am impresia ca plopul asta e defect?!


Ce a facut olteanul cand a aparut franzela?
Raspuns: A mancat-o cu paine...


Se duce un olten si cu un moldovean la furat de gainii.
Ii zice olteanu la moldovean.
- Ba, tu intri si bagi gainiile in sac si eu stau aici si cand zic 6 inseamna ca vine cineva. Vezi tu ce faci, ori te ascunzi ori fugi.
- Bine ma.
Intra moldoveanu, baga o gaina in sac, baga 2,3,4 si la un moment dat il aude pe oltean care zice:
- Sase, sase!
Moldoveanul, iritat:
- Ce sase ma, ca le iau pe toate!


O data, sotia unui oltean, fiind lenesa, ca sa nu lucreze se dadu bolnava .
Ii spuse sotului ei ca are obosire de munca si este grav bolnava.
Nestiind ce sa faca, olteanu se duse la farmacie sa cumpere medicamente.
Oltenul: Aveti ceva pentru boala obosire de munca?
Farmacistul: - Da, intinde capul!
Oltenul il intise iar farmacistul ii dadu doi pumni in fata de il ameti.
Oltenul: - Da de ce m-ai lovit?
Farmacistul:- Asta-i medicamentul. Il dai si sotiei tale si o vindeca.
Oltenul merse acasa si ii dadu un pumn sotiei, de sari din pat sus si incepu sa lucreze ca bagata in priza.
Olteanul, multumit, se duse inapoi la farmacist.
- Am venit sa-ti mutumesc. Medicamentul a mers perfect.
Farmacistul:
- Vezi, ti-am zis eu!
Olteanul:
- Dar mi-o trebuit doar o doza, asa ca pe cealata ti-o dau inapoi!


De ce oltenii au camasa scurta la spate ?
Sa ii pupe in cur aia care ii ia la misto!


-Cum scot olteni musca afara din casa?
-Se caca in fata usii...